Big Brain Disease?

After one AA member shared disparagingly about his "intellectualism," I recently heard another member say that he also had "Big Brain Disease." I guess his brain wasn't so diseased that he could not identify the previous speaker's illness as his own. Nor was it so diseased that he was not able to discriminate between big and little brains.

To disparage thinking is to disparage the Creator of thought. Some have said that this world is merely God's thought.

I have no problem with people dumbing down their recovery, but I am a happy, thoughtful, and sober alcoholic. I like to search for similarities and differences in the treatment and progress of people's recovery. I like to conjecture on theories or mechanisms that can explain the differences and similarities ... in order to reproduce successes and avoid failures.

Before I go any further, I'd like to distinguish thought from other forms of internal dialog. A half-hour silent mental rant against a lover, employer, or family member is NOT thought. It is internal dialog.

Thought is a learned type of discourse that involves checking one's beliefs against the world. Thought is learning how propositions are derived from other propositions. Thought is being alert to assumptions and biases that are affecting the choice of data and the recording of data. Thought is being aware of the various types of persuasive evidence and understanding how to give weight to different types of evidence. And finally, thought is SOCIAL – thought invites criticism and never rests in self-satisfaction. Thought invites others to comment and to aid in the creative endeavor.

Thought is what brought me to my first AA meeting and keeps me coming back.

That said, I understand that a newly sober drunk's internal dialog is full of self-destructive tendencies and presuppositions. I agree that the newly sober should be very wary of their own internal dialog because the toxic mind usually has become very good at justifying or excusing destructive behavior. Also, the toxic mind usually has settled into destructive philosophies and worldviews that support their sad, angry, and poisoned mind. These philosophies and familiar excuses only make it easier to return to their toxic lifestyle. Justification, speculation, and excuses are not thinking – they are ways to avoid thinking.

I don't think thinking is the source of the problem – I think the problem is arrogance. And one can be an arrogant, self-satisfied intellectual, and one can be an arrogant, self-satisfied Know-Nothing. Herbert Spencer states in one of the appendices to the Big Book that one of the great obstacles to recovery is "contempt prior to investigation." Herbert Spencer was an intellectual.

AA asks newcomers to investigate and to think. To honestly review the evidence of their drinking. To take note of the various modifications to their drinking and the success or failures of these practices. AA asks the newcomer to "shelve" their worldviews, rather than become "stuck" in them. AA asks for honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness. And most importantly, AA asks the newcomer to allow other people's input into the thought process – to invite criticism and suggestions.

I can only say to those suffering from Big Brain Disease and those who think that recovery can only come from mindlessly following orders:

Think, think, think.