More about the first meetings...

At our Briggsmore Beach meeting, one of our opening readings is from pages 159 to 160 about the first meetings of AA. That reading suggests that the first meetings were generous and inclusive, "open to anyone and everyone interested in a spiritual way of life." I would like to share a little more about those first meetings — this from pages 218-219 in Pass It On:

A.A continued to grow — a book sold, a member added, a message passed. But there was no money, no prospect of money, no real evidence that things were changing. Indeed, all during the summer of 1939, "things" got steadily worse. The situation in Europe was darkening daily; Hitler's aggression was spreading; war looked imminent. At home, unemployment remained widespread, and for the tiny band of sober alcoholics, there was continued financial destitution. Their loyalty to one another, to their newfound sobriety, and to their leader, Bill W., seemed to increase as their circumstances declined. And everywhere, through acts of commitment, they buoyed themselves and one another, and kept their courage and confidence high.

Their courage and confidence were bolstered daily by the meetings themselves. Ruth Hock [Bill W's first secretary] described them: They were "structured to the extent that there was always one speaker and Bill — maybe half an hour each — and then a long coffee session, a real get-together. We were often there till 12 o'clock, started at eight." She also said, "At that time, we did not go into Step work. Didn't have 90 day requirements. No birthdays — no recognition was made if you were sober a week or a year. If you felt you would like to speak in a year or in a month or in two weeks, they let you get up and speak, and they didn't throw you out if you got there drunk, either. They felt it was encouraging, hoping some word would stick." —Emphasis mine.

Many ideas and practices have been added to AA since its inception, such as counting time since one's last drink and celebrating sobriety "milestones." There are many people who like to share about how long it's been since their last drink. There are meetings where sobriety time is celebrated in countdown fashion or with a show of hands. But is this useful? Perhaps it is another cult tool for shaming the relapser into complying... or leaving. Think about it: the chronic relapser is an annoying reminder that the cult doesn't work for some people. Why not shame them out of the rooms by constantly reminding them of their "failure," especially if we can do it with a clean conscience by only speaking in terms of our "success"? After all, my mentioning my years and years of sobriety is only an expression of gratitude — or is it?

Might it not be an expression of smug self-satisfaction?

And he spake this parable unto certain which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others:

Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican. The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men [are], extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess.

And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as [his] eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner. I tell you, this man went down to his house justified [rather] than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.
—Luke 18:9-14.